As I was contemplating and preparing for my as a parent, I thought I was ready. I had it all together, with a beautiful clear image of how things will unfold. I had strong parenting principles that I was ready to defend and explain in details to anyone interested.
And then my first child was born: all perfect and adorable, better than I could have wished for. His little smiles would wipe off any lack of sleep, I was totally in love.
So when I first felt frustration and anger towards my little bundle of joy, I was shocked. I felt like I was literally the worst mum on earth hiding the darkest secret possible. How could it be? How could I possibly be crossed with my little angel? I started reading some parenting books (which I previously disconsidered as I knew it all, right?), and things got better, life got calmer. In fact it was all so good, we decided to have another child.
But how I did not expect the reality of 2 children! Just when I thought I got things sorted, my almost stable family life devolved into utter chaos.
And that is when I decided I needed to take this parenting lifestyle a lot more seriously, because my previous knowledge on human nature, communication and mental health was obviously insufficient in order to be the parent I wanted to be. I was not willing any more to avoid addressing the frustrations, the rushed lifestyle, the anger, the personal neglect.
Therefore I read all the books and online content I could find about parenting, I watched the videos, I did the workshops, I teamed up with professionals. There is no recipe to being a perfect parent, but one thing education did was to make me a much much better mum than I used to be. Yes, it will always be a work in progress, and no one really has a secret to an ideal,Instagram worthy photo of family life, but right now I can really say I enjoy the challenges that come with it. I love being the one guiding my kids through tantrums, helping them when they feel overwhelmed, showing them the freedom that comes from positive discipline. And I know that when they push my buttons it is in fact a sign that there is something in me that needs to come out and be addressed so we can all be happier.
Because being a parent is in fact the best call to personal development, we really need our kids almost as much as they need us.
